»I« am probably bullying myself at work the most. I feel like a walking lie. Just … fake, like, that person that you see there, it’s not even really »me«. I cannot stop the pretend 🤦 conditioned to feel that the mean attitude of people from my past and their opinions on me is my identity …
I’ll try to accept that maybe for the others the feelings I experience is not how they think about me and, perhaps, grow a little bit further out of my internalized shame. Hmm…
I’m not going into details, but you’re definitely not the only one. For some people life’s horrible, really. Been waking up with panic attacks for most of my life. In the last few weeks I’m waking up with a lot less stress, that’s good. I try to keep my focus on what’s going well in my life, it doesn’t change the past, but helps kindof to live in the present. I don’t think about tomorrow
Or, like, not really knowing how to express oneself. I’ve got a lot on my mind to share in specific
subscommunities though it’s difficult as I don’t feel like knowing who I’m talking to