Exposure therapy can be quite powerful. Let yourself feel upset: don’t be ashamed that your emotions lash out. Let yourself feel, then remind yourself how things aren’t as bad as they feel. Feeling and introspecting rather than suppressing in the face of pain is emotional weight lifting.
There will be times when you lack the emotional strength to exercise, and that’s ok too. Everything in life ebbs and flows, and you can slowly make meaningful progress toward deeper happiness by taking advantage of the flows while showing yourself grace for your human imperfections when things ebb.
A major pillar of self improvement it seems we share is letting go of the expectation that everyone will like you. It’s just as likely to be someone else’s problems that lead them to not gel with you as it is to be your own problems. You have just as much a right to be imperfect as they do, but no amount of self-improvement can change other people’s problems. At any given moment, the world simply is as it is and you can only make choices to navigate the future as best as you are able.
Finding controlled ways to put yourself in a bit of emotional peril can be helpful, like creating a throwaway to try and ernestly engage in a new online community. Put that mask out there as your avatar, knowing that you can always discard it when it ceases to be useful.
At a more advanced level you might go try participating in some public in-person activity, knowing you can exit that community at any time and return to your solitude. Even if in the worst case scenario they did come to ‘hate’ you, that ceases to matter once you leave them behind. They’ll forget you long before you forget them.
Let yourself feel the despair of failure, and then let yourself see how those feelings do nothing to stop you from living and growing. In fact, growing is ultimately impossible without failure. Focus on your successes, and let your past failures be signposts of your improvement.
Of course none of this is easy, but this is a journey that spans your whole life whether you want it to or not. Every time you gather the strength to engage thoughtfully with it (as you have here!), you plant seeds that you will someday get to enjoy the fruits of.
Support structures are key; DM me if you’d ever like to engage more directly in a dialog.
Terraform is great automation, but it really shines over scripts in a few ways:
- intrinsic documentation for your infrastructure
- much less brittle to differences in the initial state
- changing your setup later doesn’t require any new script logic, just a simple config change
- much better support for collaborative editing
How do you know your continuity of experience would continue? The new copy would have the memories of going in to the transporter, but for all we know your individual consciousness still ended and was replaced with a distinct but externally equivalent one.
Otherwise, how could you have a Thomas Riker situation where two copies of a transporter pattern are materialized? They don’t share a single consciousness.
Just because they can un-burn you at the end doesn’t mean your body isn’t destroyed when you leave. Even if the atoms were just re-arranged and not converted to energy, you’re still getting pureed and then reconstituted. Hard to argue you’re not dead when your brain has been completely disassembled.
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