This sounds like an example of the “crab bucket mentality.” It’s very common, especially among groups who have experienced trauma such as poverty, war, or racism.
You can absolutely live your own life, and learn the things you’re interested in. Still, it’s good to keep some compassion for your family members. They probably do love you and want you to be happy. They might just be frightened of you stepping outside their reality.
Not really a lesson learned, but a line that stayed with me. I forget which book it’s in, maybe Post Office, but he writes about a winning streak he had at the track. It was so good he either quit or took a leave of absence from his job. He woke late, enjoyed steak and scotch, then ambled down to the track. And then he says, “it was a great life, and I did not tire of it.”
All our lives, we’re told that wealth won’t buy happiness, that the only true fulfillment comes from hard work, and that getting what we want will only lead to misery. But here’s Bukowski describing a life of utter self-indulgence, and saying he never got tired of it. Profound.
I’m afraid so. There are a lot of people still fighting our Civil War, the one that supposedly ended over 150 years ago. Even without those troglodytes, there is a distinct cultural difference between the North and South, as I think there is in many countries. We tend to rub each other the wrong way sometimes.
Old joke about the difference. Walk up to a Southerner’s house, and they say, “can I help you?” Walk up to a Yankee’s house, and it’s, “whaddya want?”
Someone who will treat you well won’t need to tell you that they will treat you well. It’s kind of like how liars and scammers make a big deal about how honest they are. Another big clue is that he was telling you this while both of you were with other people. He cheats on one partner, he’d cheat on you, too.
Texan here. Yankee is definitely not a neutral word to refer to everyone from the USA. Some people down here will fight you over it, but most would just give you a confused look.
I’ve always understood gringo to mean white person, especially one who can’t speak Spanish. The term is sometimes used in Mexican restaurants to let the staff know that you can’t deal with too many jalapeños.
I like reaction videos. If you don’t like them, don’t watch them, this isn’t complicated. I think football is stupid, but lots of people love it. It’s a big ol world, and it’s full of people with nervous systems all firing in different ways. Stop yucking other people’s yums.
Some of us are homebound with various disabilities. Some of us are too ill or too medicated to deal with actual social interaction. Reactions offer a parasocial experience that helps stave off loneliness. Lots of things that seem “stupid” turn out to be helpful for disabled people.