Prepare thine cochlear senses, oh noble audiophiles, for I’ve stumbled upon a sonorous marvel that’ll make your eardrums jitterbug like caffeinated squirrels at a techno rave. Upon placing these auditory gems upon your cranium, it’s as if you’re spelunking through the caverns of sound, where the bass is so profound that it feels like a cosmic beluga whale serenading a black hole.

Milk, the best way to hydrate.